You're Not Alone
by Lady Tsuru27
Summary: Facing death is a frightening thing, especially when you're alone. But Tetsuhiro isn't as alone as he thinks he is...


**Disclaimer: I don't own them, so… Yeah…**

**Warnings: Some angst, yaoi hints (duh), slight cursing, fluff, mention of character death**

**Summary: Death is a frightening thing, especially when you're facing it alone. But Tetsuhiro isn't as alone as he thinks he is…**

**Notes: This just came to mind one day. Enjoy! **

You're Not Alone

Tetsuhiro whistled to himself as he descended the stairs to his assigned workstation. The laboratories were unusually quiet because of the holiday; many workers had requested time off. It was only out of charity that Tetsuhiro hadn't taken the day off, as well; his lab partner wanted to spend time with his elderly mother – it was, after all, Respect for the Aged Day – and Tetsuhiro hadn't wanted to keep him.

He was actually pretty happy. In light of the holiday, and to celebrate the successful completion of his first film documentary, Souichi's father had come back to visit with his family. Tomoe and Kurokawa had returned, as well, and now they were all over at Matsuda's place. It gave Tetsuhiro a nice feeling to know that his senpai was currently with his family, and that he would be joining them as soon as he got off of work at three. There was still the awkward feeling of being "the outsider", and he was curious to find out if Souichi had indeed informed them all of their relationship as he said he had. Still, Tetsuhiro was feeling hopeful that finally, he would have what he'd missed so much: a family.

As he entered the lower laboratory area, he sniffed at the air. It smelled a bit like freshly-mown grass. There was nobody down there, but this sort of thing had happened before. Someone had probably left a vent open, and he could now smell the fresh clippings from outside.

Setting up his work for the day, Tetsuhiro began to feel a little disappointed. None of his usual co-workers were around today, and most of the other employees were on the upper levels blowing off their lab work in favor of the more laid-back desk work. He felt a little lonely with nobody to talk to. He went about his work as usual, though, intent on getting it done as soon as possible so he would be ready to clock out at the early closing time.

It wasn't long before he began to think that something was wrong. For one thing, he was beginning to cough and sneeze because of the grassy smell. For another, he began to feel anxious, as if he were being watched.

"Come to think of it…" he said to himself, "I've never been down here alone." He was beginning to get the creeps. His station was brightly lit, but the others were dark. Looking up from his little corner of the lab, he could see the long rows of similar counters and cabinets stretching away into the darkness. "I guess it is a little creepy, being down here alone…" he laughed nervously.

Suddenly there was a crash. Tetsuhiro jumped, dropping his pen, and spun around. The sudden movement made him dizzy, and he staggered back to steady himself against the counter. A second glance revealed that a canister of cotton balls had fallen from the shelf behind him. It had broken, scattering glass and cotton all around.

"H- huh…" Tetsuhiro walked over to the mess shakily, then grabbed the broom and dustpan and began to clean it up. That was when he realized that bending down made it hard to breathe.

He began to feel a little panicked. He was starting to feel awful, and looking down made him dizzy. He had been so engrossed in his work that he hadn't given a second thought to his sudden bout of allergies, but now he noticed that they were growing worse each minute. He stood up, stumbled, pushed himself to the wall, and broke into a coughing fit. _"This isn't normal," _he thought, _"Shit… What if…" _The choking that seized him confirmed his fears. _"There's a gas leak!" _he thought, pushing himself along the wall. It had to be a phosgene gas leak; he had been briefed on the various dangerous chemicals routinely kept around the lab, and phosgene had been one of them. It was said to smell like cut grass or hay, which would explain the scent.

He was quickly becoming disoriented, and his eyes were beginning to water. Panicked, he wondered where the door was… and started when he saw a woman standing a few feet away from him.

She was tall and slender, with brown hair that was cut at her shoulders. She was looking at him with a worried expression. Without a word, though, she turned and walked towards the door at the end of the hall. Coughing and staggering, Tetsuhiro followed her. He didn't know who she was or where she'd come from, but he had a feeling that she was leading him to safety.

That's just what she did. Tetsuhiro opened the door to find himself back at the stairway. The woman walked up them, slightly ahead of him, and he followed as best he could. The climb took a lot out of him, though. By the time he reached the top, his vision was going dark. He was able to get out one word, "Thank…" before collapsing in front of two startled co-workers.

XXXXX

The suffocating feeling was gone. So were the dizziness and the fear. Tetsuhiro was now standing… somewhere. He didn't really know where. All he knew was that he felt lonely. "Senpai…" he whispered, and his voice dissolved into the void. His thoughts were more real to him than ever now, and he thought of Souichi to keep from feeling afraid again.

He knew that he was dying. He knew, yet he felt OK about it. He missed his senpai, though. Thinking about him brought pain to his heart, and he trembled with it. He didn't want to let go of that one thought, but he figured that death would be all right if he could just keep thinking of Souichi.

He didn't even think about how long he stood there, waiting for something to happen. Time didn't mean a thing to him now. When the woman appeared in front of him again, he wasn't really surprised to see her. It piqued his curiosity, though. She was smiling sadly at him.

"I'm sorry," she said. Her voice was kind and warm, and it filled Tetsuhiro with a feeling of comfort.

"For what?"

"I tried to warn you in time," she said, "I made the door stick, knocked down that jar…"

"You were the one who did that? Why?"

"I couldn't let my son's lover die so senselessly," she said sadly. That shocked Tetsuhiro.

"I thought I recognized you!" he said, "You're Senpai's mother!"

"Yes, I'm Hana. I wish that we could have met under better circumstances…"

"Y- yeah…" he was beginning to feel less serene and more agitated, "Am I really dead?"

"Not quite," Hana said, "You're currently hovering between the worlds. Your soul is fading from the mortal world, though. You're letting it."

"Huh?"

"Why do you feel so comfortable with dying?"

"I…" it struck him that he didn't know.

"It's all right," she walked over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder, "Most people feel this way. This is a place without fear or pain, so it's natural that you feel at peace. But do you remember who you've left behind?"

"… Senpai…" he looked down, suddenly ashamed.

"Souichi isn't the only one waiting for you."

"Huh?" he looked up, startled, "Who else is?"

"Your family."

"Ha…" he laughed humorlessly, "You must not know me that well… My family disowned me."

"No, not your biological family. Your family."

"My family?"

"Yes. They're waiting for you to wake up." She reached up from his shoulder to ruffle his hair; her touch was loving, like a mother's would be.

"How long have I been here?"

"It's been a few hours. You're in the hospital now."

He was beginning to feel different. His body – or spiritual body – was starting to tingle. "What's happening?" he asked, beginning to feel afraid again.

"You're going back," Hana's smile was brighter now, "You've found the will to live; it happens sometimes, when people truly don't want to die and when they're able to come back from the edge. I'll see you later, OK?"

"OK…"

"Remember that my son loves you very much," she said, though she was beginning to fade. She opened her mouth to say something, but stopped herself. She seemed to be searching for the right words. Just as Tetsuhiro's surroundings went dark again, and just before she faded, she said, "Tell everyone I said hi."

XXXXX

The next thing Tetsuhiro saw was an expanse of gray. He blinked, opened his eyes wider, and the gray mass became a tiled ceiling. He realized he was in a dimly-lit room; slatted bars of light were glowing softly on the ceiling, indicating a window with blinds closed over it.

"Morinaga-san!" a high-pitched voice brought his attention to his left. Turning his head was difficult, and he realized that his throat was sore. Something was in his mouth, gagging him, and he brought his hands up to his face. There was a mask over his mouth. _"An endotracheal tube," _he thought.

"You're finally awake!" another voice exclaimed, and a face appeared in front of him. It was Soujin, Souichi's father.

"Don't hover over him like that!" this voice made his heart flutter; he swore he could hear the jolt on the beeping monitor. Soujin's face disappeared, replaced by Souichi's. The worry in his eyes touched Tetsuhiro. "You moron," he said quietly, though his anger seemed to have given way to relief, "What kind of idiot goes down into a lab that smells like phosgene gas?"

"_I'm sorry," _Tetsuhiro wanted to say, but the tube prevented him from doing so.

"We're really glad you're OK, Morinaga-san!" he recognized Tomoe's voice, and Kurokawa's voice agreed.

"Oh, dear… We should call a doctor in here. He still has that tube stuck down his throat!" it took him a moment, but he realized that it was Matsuda who had spoken.

They were all here. Hana had said his family was waiting for him, and they were. Tears came to his eyes, and he squinted them shut to try to stop them. He was so happy, though, that he couldn't. They ran down his face, and he felt someone wipe them away. Opening his eyes again, he saw Souichi leaning over him. "Don't cry, idiot," he said, though tears gleamed in his own eyes, "You're fine. Tomoe just pressed the call button, so they'll come in and take that thing out so you can explain yourself."

A sudden commotion made everybody start, and there was the sound of footsteps speeding along the hall as nurses cried out in surprise. Tetsuhiro managed to turn his head enough to see the door; a second later, Kunihiro came crashing through it. "I- is he awake yet?" he panted, obviously out of breath.

Kunihiro came into the room, followed by a nurse. "Sir, there are way too many people in here already!" she sighed, "Running from us won't deter us; you have to leave!"

"He's my brother!" Kunihiro said indignantly.

"Umm… if it's really a problem, I'll get out of the way for a minute," Tomoe said.

"Fine," the nurse agreed, though she shot a baleful look at Kunihiro. She led Tomoe out of the room, then returned. "Sorry about that," she said, walking over and pressing the call button to stop its flashing. "We're rather busy out there, and I was on my way here when this person ran past me…"

"Tetsuhiro…" Kunihiro said, ignoring the nurse, "Are you… OK?"

Tetsuhiro nodded as well as he could, but his view was blocked by the nurse. "We'll get that tube out now," she said, "You've been decontaminated, so after all this time you should be able to breathe on your own."

The tube came out, leaving Tetsuhiro gagging slightly and coughing. The nurse unhooked the tube and replaced the mask, saying that it was better to keep oxygen going as a precaution. Clearing his throat, Tetsuhiro turned his head fully to look at the people in the room. Souichi, Soujin, Kanako, Kurokawa, Matsuda, Kunihiro, and Tomoe – peeking in from the open doorway – all stood looking at him.

Clearing his throat again, Tetsuhiro looked back at them all. Then his gaze met a pair of beautiful amber eyes. He stared in shock as he realized that Hana was standing in the corner, smiling in a much more cheerful way than before. _"She's been watching out for us this whole time," _he realized. She wasn't looking on sorrowfully, but with joy radiating from her. She was happy with the way things were now; that much he could tell.

Tetsuhiro wondered if he should say anything about it to Souichi or the others. Looking at Hana's calm countenance, though, he decided not to. It would probably only make them sad to think that her spirit was lingering to watch over them – maybe even a little creeped out, too. Hana wouldn't want them to be sad, and she certainly wouldn't want to be thought of as a remorseful ghost. She had made her peace with her fate.

"Hey, what are you looking at?" Souichi asked, glancing over his shoulder towards the corner. He didn't seem to see her; nobody else registered her presence, either.

Clearing his throat, Tetsuhiro tested his voice. It was raspy and made his throat hurt a little, but he managed to say, while looking up at Souichi, "Your mom says hi."

Her message delivered, and with one last look at her flabbergasted family, Hana disappeared from the corner. Whether or not she had left for good wasn't really a question in Tetsuhiro's mind.

He knew that she would always be there.

XXXXX

**Well? Kinda cheesy, I guess, but I like fluffiness. Reviews are appreciated! **


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